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I went out with my girlfriend and asked her,"Why is it everytime I go out with you, I end upspending hundreds of dollars?" "Because I'm a prostitute." |
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A man walks into his bedroom and sees his wife packing a suitcase. He asks, "What are you doing?"
She answers, "I'm moving to Nevada. I heard prostitutes there get paid $400 for doing what I do for you for free."
Later that night, on her way out, the wife walks into the bedroom and sees her husband packing his suitcase. When she asks him where he's going, he replies,
"I'm coming, too. I want to see how you live on $800 a year!" |
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This guy was walking down the street and this hooker says, "Say, wanna have a good time?" "Sure," he says and they were off to the nearest motel.
She takes off her clothes and he keeps staring at her. She says, "Is this the first pussy you seen since you crawled out of one?" The guy says,
"Nope, just the first one I've seen big enough to crawl back into." |
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A prostitute gets run over by a car. A passer-by goes to her aid, and the prostitute says, "Oh no, I feel dizzy and I can't see."
The passer-by shows the prostitute his hand and asks, "How many fingers have I got up?"
Then the prostitute screams "Oh no. I'm paralysed as well!" |
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Two dwarfs go into a bar, where they pick up two prostitutes and take them to their separate hotel rooms.
The first dwarf, however, is unable to get a stiffy. His depression is enhanced by the fact that, from the next room, he hears cries of, "ONE, TWO, THREE...UUUUH!" all night long.
In the morning, the second dwarf asks the first, "How did it go?"
The first whispered back, "It was so embarrassing. I just couldn't get a hard on."
The second dwarf shook his head. "You think that's embarrassing?!!" he asked. "I couldn't even get on the bed!!!" |
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